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Horoscopes- January

Beyond The Beyond

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Aquarius

January 20-February 18

Be watchful of your actions. There are times for risk-taking. This isn’t one of them.

 

Pisces

February 19-March 20

You don’t need to be able to read the stars to know that you shouldn’t microwave your burrito in the tin foil. But you’re trying your best and that’s all that matters! #loveyou

 

Aries

March 21-April 19

You don’t have to be edgy and mysterious for people to like you. But if that’s just your aesthetic, then, by all means!

 

Taurus

April 20-May 20

I envy your academic skills, I really do. Treat yourself. You deserve it, champ.

 

Gemini

May 21-June 20

I know you like to keep to yourself, but they’ll never know if you never tell them. It’s about time, young man.

 

Cancer

June 21-July 22

Animals are cute, I know. But, you don’t have to cry everytime you see a kitten! I’m concerned!

 

Leo

July 23-August 23

You’re stressed. I’m stressed. Don’t be afraid to talk to new people this month. You’ll see that you may have a lot in common with those you’d least expect.

 

Virgo

August 23-September 23

You may feel like you have to prove yourself everyday but we already know you’re great. Take a break. Have some tea.

 

Libra

September 23-October 22

This is going to be a good month for you. I have a feeling. But I’m not psychic so if I’m wrong just remember you put your faith in a newspaper article run by a high school student that sometimes writes the wrong date on her papers and microwaved a burrito in tin foil. (Sorry Pisces, it was me!)

 

Scorpio

October 23-November 21

You possess a very strong energy. Be careful how it manifests and be conscious of how it affects those around you. You’re like the Mitochondria, you have the ability to change the energy in the room. Make it better.

 

Sagittarius

November 22-December 21

Not everybody enjoys the spontaneous singing of show tunes in the middle of class. I do, however, admire your confidence. Keep that.

 

Capricorn

December 22-January 19

Your WCW wears all black clothes, never washes her hair, and flourishes when the sun spans the 270–300th degree of the zodiac, corresponding to celestial longitude under the tropical zodiac. It’s me, I’m your WCW. #whatintarnationisaseagoat #capseason #winning

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Horoscopes- January