Tiger Times

Horoscopes- October 2017

Your Local Spirit Guide

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SCORPIO
Oct 23-Nov 21
Stop jumping to conclusions, it’s
bad on the knees.
SAGITTARIUS
Nov 22-Dec 21
You’re doing great, sweetie!
CAPRICORN
Dec 22-Jan 19
It’s called a garbage can, not a
garbage cannotfinishtheirhomeworkontime!
AQUARIUS
Jan 20-Feb 18
Check all the nooks, no way you
left your keys in some cranny.
PISCES
Feb 19 to March 20
I heard you were avio-coulroglosso-
metrophobic. Don’t worry!
There are no clowns forcing you
to read poems on airplanes here!
(avoid the top floor)
ARIES March 21-April 19
So, you’re afraid of sharks? What,
are you afraid of ears too?
TAURUS April 20-May 20
“It’s super cool that you disrespect
women!” – said no one ever. Stop
it, ugly.
GEMINI May 21-June 20
Why break hearts when you can
break bread with your twelve closest
disciples.
CANCER June 21-July 22
I’m not crying, you are.
LEO July 23-Aug 22
Life is always one steps forward,
two steps back.. then sliiide to the
left.. sliiide to the right… CRISS
CROSS!
VIRGO Aug 23-Sept 22
You may be flexin’ but are you
smilin’?
LIBRA Sept 23-Oct 22
I thought I saw all the deadlines
getting closer. Then they hit me

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Horoscopes- October 2017